Here’s How You Push People Away, Based on Your Enneagram Type (Part 2 of 3) 

Home / Love & Relationships / Here’s How You Push People Away, Based on Your Enneagram Type (Part 2 of 3) 

Here’s How You Push People Away, Based on Your Enneagram Type (Part 2 of 3) 

Today, we will continue to unfold how Enneagram Type’s 4, 5, and 6 push people away. If you missed Part 1, you could read it here.

Type 4 (The Individualist)

Whimsical and free-spirited Type 4s are very comfortable sitting with negative emotions. If Fours are unable to get out of this space, this might push people away as they might not be okay with talking about their ideals or negative emotions every time they interact with a Four. Fours are also prone to going into “push-and-pull” mode, have unrealistic expectations of others, and can be hard to please at times.

Fours need to regulate the amount of time they stay in a melancholic state and focus on the brighter side of things. Always remember that feelings come and go, and emotions do not provide the absolute truth. Challenge yourself not to be enslaved by your emotions and learn to savour the joy of living in the present.

Type 5 (The Investigator)

Autonomous and inquisitive Type 5s need for personal space may cause them to shut down and isolate themselves. Fives may think that checking in with people is intrusive, which others may translate to a lack of care. Fives may also proactively dump information or data unto people without being asked for it.

Fives have to challenge themselves to move from hoarding to giving. Be generous with their time, money, energy, knowledge, and personal details, which they tend to save/hoard. Fives have to realize the importance of initiating communication to maintain relationships and recognize that expanding their energy on relationship building is meaningful, rewarding, and worthwhile. While it is encouraged for Type 5s to practice self-disclosure, they need to recognize whether it’s self-disclosure or information dumping.

Type 6 (The Loyalist)

Detail-oriented and cautious Type 6’s can be prone to anxiety and panic. Their pessimism, if expressed outwardly, might make people uneasy and annoyed. There is a huge need for security, and they may go around seeking advice from many parties and ended up being more confused themselves. Others may perceive them as being overreactive and overly dependent.

Six’s lifelong battle is to trust in themselves, trust their own judgments, and to learn to let go of things that are out of their control. Sixes need to face their anxieties head-on, find the balance between being courageous and calm in any circumstance.


Cindy Leong
Cindy Leong
Cindy Leong is a sought after bilingual (English and Mandarin) Enneagram Personality Coach and Corporate Trainer in Asia, who can help you make sense of your professional and personal relationships. She is a member of International Coach Federation (ICF) and Singapore Psychological Society (SPS). Besides a Bachelor Degree in Psychology (majoring in Communications), she also has a Diploma in Business and has done in-depth research and studies in the areas of Organisational Behaviour and Gender Communications, both in Singapore and Taiwan. Through her expertise in corporate executive coaching, personal development, and relationship coaching, she has helped many professionals in their walk through challenging times, particularly in the areas of identity searching, relationship building and career breakthrough. Aside from being a published author of 2 books, she has also been invited by several radio stations and magazines as an expert guest speaker to provide insights into Enneagram, workplace conflicts and relationships.
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