CONSULT A RELATIONSHIP EXPERT #03 (C.A.R.E. SERIES) – WE HAVE BEEN QUARRELING A LOT
Lately, me and my wife have been quarrelling a lot. I found myself having a yelling competition with her and saying things I don’t mean. I know that my words have been hurtful and I certainly feel bad whenever this happens. It’s been extremely difficult for me to control my anger. Could you offer me some tips to be more patient? Please help me. Thank you!
I hear you. It is not easy to be patient at all times. I am happy to hear that you want to work on yourself and be more patient. I will share a few tips, and I hope you will apply this.
- Understand your spouse as a person, not as a “role”
You have to learn more about your spouse’s character, weaknesses, fears, dreams, aspirations, both the good and the bad. Knowing them in and out, you will be able to understand their strengths and flaws and become more naturally patient when dealing with them. Remember that you chose to be with your spouse because you love them and not for what they can do for you.
- Manage expectations
No one is perfect, and your spouse is no exception. You need to accept them with a whole heart. Realise that they are also human and have limitations. What I can do doesn’t mean someone else can do it. On the same token, my partner can do things that I can’t. Expectation management is the key to all happiness in life. Unrealistic expectations will only give us more frustration and it doesn’t help the relationship.
I have recently written an article about this topic and you can read the rest of my tips here: https://relationshipstudio.sg/how-to-be-patient-with-your-spouse/
I hope this helps, and now, good luck in taking baby steps!
*Name(s) have been changed to protect the privacy of the individual.
IF YOU OR IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO’S GOING THROUGH THIS, DO BOOK A CONSULTATION SESSION AND SPEAK TO US!