We NEED to CHANGE: Why must we do it NOW?

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We NEED to CHANGE: Why must we do it NOW?

Change is difficult. Not to change is fatal. ~Unknown

Life is complex and we experience a plethora of highs and lows throughout our journey. Change is the only constant thing and yet we are often resistant to change.

If there’s one thing you should know about Enneagram is that it is a powerful framework for personal and collective transformation. Your Enneagram type gives you insights of your unconscious coping mechanisms and invites you out of your type and into your true and best version of yourself. It is our mission to encourage and empower people to move up on their mastery level by channelling the gifts and strengths of your wings and arrows.

And when life throws us curveballs, we may either find ourselves thriving or struggling. Let’s talk about 3 occasions on when we can initiate change:

  1. When all is good and you want to change.

If you found yourself a little dissatisfied of the status quo, you may want to start making changes before anything happens. Being proactive in making changes is a great way to gain more knowledge about one-self. Doing it as an experiment enables us to gain clarity and confidence. We can start by knowing exactly what you want to achieve and then ask for feedback or advice. In this setting there is no pressure to perform or quickly adapt to changes as you are exploring different possibilities.

For example, a Type 1 teacher would like to work in being less regimental in her teaching. Asking feedback from the students and other teachers of another type would be helpful. A type 7 teacher could suggest fun ways to engage students and teach her how to be more animated. A Type 2 teacher can provide insights how to be more nurturing and encourage students to open up thus improving relationship with the students. A type 4 teacher can provide tips on how effective storytelling can improve on the quality of lessons delivered.

 

  1. When you’re going through changes in life.

You received a promotion at your workplace or starting parenthood. When we enter a different stage in our life, we are bound to make changes in our attitude, behaviour and our personality. At this level there is a huge pressure to pick up things quickly. The room for making mistakes might be narrow depending on the situation as you now have a responsibility to look after.

For example, if you’re a type 5 and just welcomed your newborn, you will have to give up a lot of your personal time which you valued dearly. Or if you’re a type 3 sales person who just got promoted as a team manager, instead of focusing on your own sales figure, you will have to look after your team and help them reach their target. If you’re unable to nurture, build trust, and empathize with your team members, it will greatly affect the team’s performance.

 

  1. When something bad had happened.

Bankruptcy, break-ups, getting fired, these are all terrible things that can happen to any of us. When devastating situations happen, it is a clear sign that a change needs to be done. Especially when people in your life starts giving up on you. This happens when people don’t see any point in giving you feedback or they are tired with putting up with your difficult behaviour. It will be tough to gather any feedback being in a highly stressful situation. At this moment you will have to depend on yourself, dig deep and do a self-reflection or even seek professional help.

Using the previous example, if the Type 3 manager is unable to nurture, spend time listening to the team members’ feedback, the team members will feel neglected, unvalued and might harbour negative feelings towards him.  Ultimately, they will find it impossible to work with this leader and leave. This type 3 manager might find himself in a situation where the entire team is leaving him.

 

Choose your poison wisely

When external forces call for a change there is so much at stake and the amount of stress might be unbearable. In this transitionary period, it is vital, and can also be therapeutic, to force oneself into situations that might be uncomfortable in an attempt to evolve one’s lifestyle. This can both be helpful in solving whatever it was that caused the negative life event, or at the very least can simply be a way to make a positive change in a time of otherwise negative emotions. While being forced into such measures is far from ideal, you can take life by the horns and take advantage of this period to make some changes. Clearly, when change is done proactively, we benefit immensely and avoid unnecessary stress.

 

The question now is, what is your choice?

 

Cindy Leong
Cindy Leong
Cindy Leong is a sought after bilingual (English and Mandarin) Enneagram Personality Coach and Corporate Trainer in Asia, who can help you make sense of your professional and personal relationships. She is a member of International Coach Federation (ICF) and Singapore Psychological Society (SPS). Besides a Bachelor Degree in Psychology (majoring in Communications), she also has a Diploma in Business and has done in-depth research and studies in the areas of Organisational Behaviour and Gender Communications, both in Singapore and Taiwan. Through her expertise in corporate executive coaching, personal development, and relationship coaching, she has helped many professionals in their walk through challenging times, particularly in the areas of identity searching, relationship building and career breakthrough. Aside from being a published author of 2 books, she has also been invited by several radio stations and magazines as an expert guest speaker to provide insights into Enneagram, workplace conflicts and relationships.
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