WHY YOUR ENNEAGRAM TYPE COULD BE THE ROAD TO FINDING HAPPINESS IN RELATIONSHIPS

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WHY YOUR ENNEAGRAM TYPE COULD BE THE ROAD TO FINDING HAPPINESS IN RELATIONSHIPS

Personality systems such as Enneagram profiling can come across as a bit reductionistic (are there seriously only nine types of people in the world?), but that doesn’t stop it from being helpful when it comes to understanding yourself and your partner – be it in terms of strengths, weaknesses, blind spots or ego structure.

Enneagram profiling involves nine different types of personalities. From what shapes your worldview and motivates you to keep going to what drives you to build defenses and frightens you, it is a way to dig deep and be more introspective. By knowing which type you are, you’ll be more aware of how to relate to others and communicate effectively whether at work or in social situations.

Notice that Type 7s may talk relatively fast as compared to 5s? That observation would help you adjust your speech patterns accordingly, says Cindy Leong, dating and relationship coach at Divine Connect.

1. It’ll prompt you to make the most out of your couple combination

couple combination

Photo: 123rf

“A Type 7 might also like a 5 who is cool and composed and logical, which compliments the impulsive 7, or a Type 7 might like a 6 for being more grounded and realistic,” says Cindy. There’s no “best match”.  Every type can be a good match to anyone for a variety of reasons and likewise, everyone would have a different set of conflicts.

2. It’ll help you understand what comes naturally to your partner

sweet gesture

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And what doesn’t. This way, you’ll learn to appreciate gestures betters and be able to manage your expectations – maybe even cut your partner a little slack if necessary, says Cindy. “For example, self-disclosure for Type 2 is easy, whereas hard for Type 5. So if your partner is a 5 and making an effort to open up, you’ll be able to pick up on the little improvement and appreciate the effort made.”

3. It’ll guide you towards areas for improvement

couple

Photo: 123rf

There’s little doubt that relationships enable personal growth. Well, Enneagram takes it up a notch by pinpointing your weaknesses so that you and your partner can identify areas for improvement. That way you can figure out how to meet in the middle and set boundaries in order to move forward and take your relationship to the next level.

4. It’ll cushion blows and facilitate problem-solving

happy couple

Photo: 123rf

Cindy explains that knowing your Enneagram won’t just help you anticipate when conflict is around the corner and what to do to discuss things openly, but also help you figure out how to create a safe environment for your partner to open up. Even if one of you says something that throws the other off the chair, don’t balk or judge because of different views.

“Instead, be open to receive, listen, and always ask why – what do you like about something and why does he want you to do a certain behaviour,” says Cindy. Don’t be afraid to dig deep. Ask tough questions and never take words at face value.

This article is featured in Her World. Written by Hoe I Yune

Cindy Leong
Cindy Leong
A Dating and Relationship Coach who has helped many youths and professionals in their journey through relationship searching and building. Cindy is a direct and energetic individual, who aims to bring out the best in everyone she meets. Her extensive coaching and dating experience has helped her coach men to find their social standing in the society. Cindy holds a Bachelor Degree in Psychology, majoring in Communications and has done many research studies in the area of Gender Communications, Cultural Communications, Jealousy and Mating Choices. Get in touch with Cindy via email at coffee@relationshipstudio.sg
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